Single friend with relationship friends
How to deal with being single when all your friends are in a relationship/always have flings with people & I’m finding it a bit hard to meet people that progress into something longer than 2 dates. Obviously I’m not perfect but I don’t think there’s anything I’m doing wrong on the first dates I just haven’t met the right person I guess? For added context: I’m a lesbian and most of my friends are bisexual or straight women so I don’t know if it’s just because the pool is smaller for me. Any advice? People say to enjoy being single but I’ve only had a toxic situationship & one toxic long distance online relationships 5 years ago. I haven’t dated anyone in 2 years because everyone I’ve tried to date has progressed past 1 or 2 dates. Also love your podcast so much and it’s helped a lot, really glad I joined the premium version!
Tips for feeling "stuck" in dating. I have been single for the last 2.5 years (previous 10 year relo) and dated a string of guys, but in the last month I have either been "dumped" or just haven't heard back from a guy after a date. I've been in therapy for the past few years, so am in a place where I can see it's a reflection of them/ the space they're in, rather than a reflection of my self worth. That said, there's a common denominator here... and it's ME! Lol My question, what do I do? I just feel like I'm coming up against brick walls. Do I just accept that right now isn't my time to be dating? And get off the apps? Love all of your advice and what you stand for. You've been instrumental in shifting my perspective on dating. Thank you .
Tips for feeling "stuck" in dating. I have been single for the last 2.5 years (previously was in a 10 year relo ) and since dated a string of guys, but in the last month I have either been "dumped" or just haven't heard back from a guy after a date. I've been in therapy for the past few years, so am in a place where I can see it's a reflection of them/ the space they're in, rather than a reflection of my self worth. That said, there's a common denominator here... and it's ME! Lol My question, what do I do? I just feel like I'm coming up against brick walls. Do I just accept that right now isn't my time to be dating? And get off the apps? Love all of your advice and what you stand for. You've been instrumental in shifting my perspective on dating. Thank you.
Not feeling it or not used to a man pursuing
I recently connected with a man, only about 2 weeks ago. He’s been coming on super strong and pursing me hardcore to the point that I feel he’s pushing me away. I’ve traditionally dealt with an anxious attachment style. In the past I would have ate this up and not surprisingly, then watched things crash and burn with my anxious attachment style. But I’ve been doing the work! for a few years now and in therapy. This behavior now feels yucky. For example, it’s not even been 2 weeks. He’s already telling me he’s falling for me, tries to see me daily (I haven’t allowed it), asked if he can meet my son (who’s 24, but still a hell no), and future talks all the time…talking about when we are married, where we’ll live, things we’ll do, etc, etc. I’ve told him he need to slow it way down. He asked me to let him know if he’s coming on too strong so he doesn’t push me away. I told him it’s too much. But, I also can’t help but to wonder…am I just not into him…or…am I not used to a man who’s pursuing me because I’m used to avoidant men and I’m used to being the one chasing? (I’ve been working through abandonment issues since I never knew my father, he left before I was 2 years old)…so no surprise that I chased love. Am I pushing away a possibly good man? He’s definitely pursuing hardcore…with dates, flowers, constant communication…or is the new, improved, healthier version of me saying, hold the f up! On a side note, I am attracted to him, but he has very very feminine characteristics and the way he talks that also turns me off. I don’t want to be judgmental or come across negative when I say this, but sometimes it does kinda give me the “ick.” Any thoughts on this as well? Thank you!! 🫶
Not feeling it or not used to a man pursuing
I recently connected with a man, only about 2 weeks ago. He’s been coming on super strong and pursing me hardcore to the point that I feel he’s pushing me away. I’ve traditionally dealt with an anxious attachment style. In the past I would have ate this up and not surprisingly, then watched things crash and burn with my anxious attachment style. But I’ve been doing the work! for a few years now and in therapy. This behavior now feels yucky. For example, it’s not even been 2 weeks. He’s already telling me he’s falling for me, tries to see me daily (I haven’t allowed it), asked if he can meet my son (who’s 24, but still a hell no), and future talks all the time…talking about when we are married, where we’ll live, things we’ll do, etc, etc. I’ve told him he need to slow it way down. He asked me to let him know if he’s coming on too strong so he doesn’t push me away. I told him it’s too much. But, I also can’t help but to wonder…am I just not into him…or…am I not used to a man who’s pursuing me because I’m used to avoidant men and I’m used to being the one chasing? (I’ve been working through abandonment issues since I never knew my father, he left before I was 2 years old)…so no surprise that I chased love. Am I pushing away a possibly good man? He’s definitely pursuing hardcore…with dates, flowers, constant communication…or is the new, improved, healthier version of me saying, hold the f up! On a side note, I am attracted to him, but he has very very feminine characteristics and the way he talks that also turns me off. I don’t want to be judgmental or come across negative when I say this, but sometimes it does kinda give me the “ick.” Any thoughts on this as well? Thank you!! 🫶